What an honor to be asked to represent the happy couple and their families at their wedding/reception; congratulations!
When it comes to duties, you probably have more questions than answers, and—although we don’t claim to have a complete guide—we have years of experience.
Every wedding is different
You’re still a guest at the event and most of your duties will be on the wedding day
Attend any bridal showers and parties to which you are invited, if possible
Provide support and assistance to the couple as any friend or family member would
You might share the honor with another person/couple, depending on the size of the event — for larger events, a person/couple may be chosen from each side of families
Traditionally, you will greet guests at the ceremony and reception sites
Old rules don't necessarily apply today: the couple may request different things of you; within reason, do what you can to assist
Day of Responsibilities
Best advice: imagine the event at your house — be on the lookout for anything you would be there. Bonus: you don’t have to clean, cook the meal, or do the dishes (hopefully)!
Your appearance matters; Dress Appropriately
Check with the couple in advance to see if there is any special requests for attire. Usually you may wear what you wish, but if you're looking for a new dress/suit, ask and take into consideration the general style and colors of the event. Be well-groomed; wear something comfortable and attractive. It's common for the host and hostess to receive a boutonniere or corsage, which you should receive before the ceremony (note: you may be asked to help pin or hand out flowers on/to other honorees as they arrive).
Arrive early and be eager to assist. If you can’t be on time, put someone else in charge or decline the honor. Additionally, you may be asked to assist with a quick cleanup after the ceremony and to transport any items to the reception site if it's at a different location, however you should arrive to the reception before other guests.
Check in with vendors. Introduce yourself. Find out if they have any special requests or needs. Re-check in periodically.
Graciously greet guests before the wedding ceremony and again later at the reception.
Introduce yourself, if you don't know them
Point them in the direction of the guest book, coat racks, gift table, restrooms, etc.
Assist them, paying special attention to the elderly and those with special needs.
Relax and have fun, but always try to keep an eye on the door and meet any late arrivals to give them a quick update. Remember, people may leave temporarily and then come back, which can be confusing when meeting a lot of new people in a short amount of time. Pro Tip: look to see if they are carrying a card or gift and watch body language. Often, a new guest will have a puzzled look on their face, or can the area to decide where to go. These are easy indications that your greeting abilities are needed once again.
Schedule: follow theirs or make one. Share it with vendors. Help ensure everyone stays on schedule.
Check in with us long before mealtime. Pay attention to keep everything running smoothly.
Find out if it is a platted and served meal (and what that means for you) or buffet style.
If buffet style meal,
Between you, the DJ, the wedding coordinator, or anybody else, decide who will be dismissing tables
Find out the order, making sure that parents and grandparents go right after the wedding party. Depending on the number of guests, you may wish to announce how dinner is served so that the guests don't get restless.
Dismiss tables, leaving no fewer than 10-20 guests yet no more than 30-40 guests standing in line at the buffet. This will assist in a speedy service, ensuring a prompt and timely meal.
Watch the dining room. Be on the lookout of spills, guest needs, service issues, or the similar…and be ready to assist, as needed.
When it’s appropriate, sit down, relax, eat, and enjoy the reception!
In advance, thank you and congratulations!
Roll'n Pin Café & Grille is a wedding caterer from Sioux Falls servicing weddings throughout the local area, including Sioux Falls, Brandon, and Tea. Roll'n Pin Café & Grille is a professional caterer & wedding caterer that has been part of the Sioux Falls, Sioux Empire, SW Minnesota, NW Iowa, and South Dakota wedding industry since 1974 specializing in absolutely delicious catering, including: American, New American, BBQ, Cajun, French, Italian, Local, Mediterranean, Mexican, Sandwiches, Seafood, Southern, Southwestern, Breakfast/Brunch, Buffet, Sheetcake, Cake Cutting, Cocktails, Receptions, Custom Menus, Desserts, Family Style, Hors d'oeuvres, Lunch, Outside Cake, Plated Meals, Server(s), Stations, Tapas, Bartender(s), House Beer, House Liquor, House Wine, Limited Bar, Open Bar, Signature Drink, Specialty Beer, Specialty Wine, Barware, China, Chocolate Fountain, Flatware & Glassware.